The Spacey Between Us

Kevin Spacey was the celebrity that I least expected to ever see associated with a scandal.

I've been a fan of his for nearly 20 years, ever since I watched American Beauty in a hotel room while on a business trip. To say that the past few weeks have not been an easy time for Kevin Spacey fans is an understatement. At many times it has felt like a nightmare that I cannot wake up from.

I'm sad, and confused. I don't know what to believe. I'm at a loss as to what to do with the DVDs of his movies I own. I can't bear to toss them and yet at the same time it's going to be a while before I can bear to watch any of them again.

I don't know how much I'm allowed to say about the allegations against him here on this blog only because the AdSense police have already flagged my site a few times for content that violates their terms and conditions. There's no need for me to rehash it all here anyway; everyone knows why Kevin Spacey could be in serious trouble.

The conflict for me is that the allegations are just that: allegations. There's no concrete evidence as of this writing that anything Spacey has been accused of has actually taken place. Some of the incidents also supposedly occurred over 30 years ago. And yet there's so many of them, too many to not believe that at least some of them are true. Not to mention he checked himself into rehab, which seems to indicate guilt and acknowledgment that he has a real problem.

In a matter of days, an entire career that was built up over decades was demolished. He was even removed from his next film to be released, All the Money In the World, replaced by Christopher Plummer. It's one of the biggest Hollywood scandals to date and we're all witnessing it.

I'm shocked because as a fan who followed Spacey's career during the past several years, I can tell you of the numerous humanitarian work the man has done when not performing. He has always cited his mentor, Jack Lemmon, with "sending the elevator back down" or helping others with their careers once you've done well for yourself. His foundation did just that, by giving grants to promising new talent in the entertainment industry.

Spacey has also participated in the Best Buddies Challenge, which teams participants with individuals with developmental disabilities on a bike ride; there's several photos online of Spacey charming kids and babies during this event. He also visited the Atlanta Children's Hospital in 2016 to entertain the kids while making the movie Baby Driver there (the film where another actor recently said he treated everyone like a bully on the set), even introducing the patients to a young singer whose singing wowed him while he was in Nashville.

He's visited a nursing home dedicated to retirees from the world of showbiz, participated and emceed at numerous charitable events, and pretty much every dog he's adopted during the past several years came from a shelter.

This is the Kevin Spacey that his dedicated fans believe him to be, which is why the stories about his behavior that have been coming in droves since October 30 are so disturbing. How could this be the same man so many people are claiming violated and used his power to intimate others?

And if it weren't for him, I never would have discovered Bobby Darin or at least, it would have taken me much longer to do so.

Although it is not an excuse for his behavior, if it is indeed true, but the stories about his childhood and upbringing that his brother Randy Fowler was telling the press may explain a lot. I remember Fowler tried exposing his family's secrets a good decade ago but it didn't get picked up by the press and I dismissed them, thinking he was simply a jealous older brother trying to make a buck off of his famous younger one.

But maybe we have reason to believe Fowler, despite his eccentric appearance (he's a limo driver who also may be a Rod Stewart impersonator. And he looks nothing like his younger brother Kevin.)

If Fowler's story about he and Kevin's father is true, then it's tragic and soul shattering. Fowler claims the patriarch was emotionally, sexually, and physically abusive and while he isn't sure if Kevin ever got attacked, he was on the receiving end many times. Mother Kathleen knew but didn't do anything to try and stop it, or protect her kids. Fowler also says their dear old dad worshipped Adolph Hitler and once made him quit the boy scouts when he learned the scoutmaster was Jewish. In pictures that have surfaced over the past few weeks, Thomas Fowler -- Randy and Kevin's dad -- is even shown sporting a Hitler mustache and similar hairstyle.

Thomas Fowler was a struggling writer who was often unemployed. The one family vacation Randy Fowler remembers was to visit a nudist colony. He said they were short on money so often that he and his siblings didn't visit a dentist for several years.

Randy believes that his father's genes, unfortunately, may have been passed onto his brother Kevin, which explains the numerous allegations stacking up against him. He says many stories Kevin has told to the press throughout the years, such as being kicked out of military school, were really Randy's experiences. He says Kevin retreated into acting and disappeared into becoming someone else as a way of dealing with a miserable home life.

(Spacey, by the way, was the mother's maiden name and he adopted it before embarking on an acting career, as Randy said Fowler didn't sound Hollywood enough.)

If these stories are true then I admit I feel sorry for Kevin Spacey. It's not an excuse for behavior that he should have known was harmful, but it may help explain a knee-jerk reaction of coming onto and groping unsuspecting victims.

And yet, does...should...all of this erase an entire career? In the past couple of weeks I've noticed that YouTube videos of Spacey have not been removed. Twitter accounts dedicated to his fans have not been deleted. Pinterest boards dedicated to him are still intact. I admit, I watched clips from American Beauty the other night and still find his performance every bit as entertaining as the first time I saw it 18 years ago. I still like the guy. It may not be the popular opinion, but it's true.

Maybe we're all waiting for the latest plot twist in this saga, and that we find out it was all just a big joke. Some are saying his career is over and that he's going to jail.

Me, I'd like to think that a year from now Kevin Spacey will give a sit-down, tell-all interview and explain himself. Hollywood often has a short memory.

I guess the next act remains to be seen.